Tuesday, September 21, 2010

Mind. Completely. Blank.


November maybe? Oh wait.. Thanksgiving Damnit. December? No freaking way, mom's birthday and Christmas.

That's my chance to see if my sanity is still hanging around and scoop it back into myself cuz right now I see celebratory hell.
I mean.
Wedded bliss and babies and stuff..
the things life is really about.
Except if you are me.
Then it's about

my classroom.
Which is cool.. but I can't think about what I'm going to put on a bulletin board or which color construction paper I can use for my next lesson plan all the time.

Seriously. I don't care if my big boss is ocming to check things out.. does she have ANY idea what it's like to be a bridesmaid 3 times in 6 months?
Yeah didn't think so.
So back off Boss Lady, my classroom looks amazing and my kids love me. Isn't that enough? Oh god I'm yelling at a lady with whom I haven't met yet. See what weddings do to a 25 year old single girl?

Although, I did start playing softball again and that was slightly exhilerating.
Only cuz I didn't suck (which was kind of awesome considering my body's condition right now), and there was a super cute boy there who was a loud mouth like me.

I will take it.
Cuz honestly a friend just shared with me her upcoming "bundle of joy" news.. and there is at least 3 more weddings and one more baby I know about for 2011..so maybe before the end of the world ( mayan calendar ending) I will get to have some time to myself.
Or actually have something to celebrate and make all those damn new couples and new mommies come celebrate me for a change.

Okay project FallinLoveGetMarried&HaveBaby commence.

WAIT WHHHHAAATTT?!?!!!! Did I just say?
See they are totally fucking with my head!

Like I said.

Weddings. (and babies)

..stay tuned.
(if I survive living out the script of 27 dresses)

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

To prove to Dad I'm not a fool...

"Back to school. Back to school, to prove to Dad I'm not a fool"

hahah cannot stop singing Billy Madison's little diddy.
I cannot believe it but here it is. The school year is upon us and I am teaching an entire class. Well.. trying to.

I've got one huge mound of opposition. She has a name but we will call her, Big B.
And man is she one. At 50 somethin' to still be playin bullshit games it's unbelievable to me. I want to teach kids. Not scream and yell at them. I guess when you bring an entire box of "treats" every day to bribe children then of course they will love you.

My approach is a little different but I can't even get into that right now. She gets me so riled up it's not even worth it most times. She's crazy and mark my words, I am going to make her life HELL until she walks her ass out the door.
I can play this game Big B... and trust me I'm better at it.
Half your age, half your size and double your brains.
Watch and see which one of us walks out that door first.

Amzingly that is one of my lesser concerns these days. Trying to tackle this classroom by myself is another one that makes me want to rip out my hair daily because I feel so ill equipped at the planning part.. the creativity I got down pat. The follow through, is what I've never been good at.
But this job is making me figure it out. Which is cool. My boss today found out about the idea of me moving to Costa Rica to persue a teaching type job there and she swore up and down she wasn't letting me go. That in the last 4 years in that classroom I am the best teacher these children have had. It feels amazing to hear that.
Costa Rica was already out before she said anything but mostly because of one of my other more pressing issues

Holy crap. I know people talk about this time in your life where everyone gets married and the single ones (OBVIOUSLY ME!) are always tossed around in the whirling winds of wedding season.
Have you seen the movie 27 dresses?
Well I should sue because apparently that movie was about me and I didn't even know it.
I'm working on being a bridesmaid for the 3rd tim in 4 months this year. WHile missing 3 weddings in attendance due to conflicting schedules also while trying to make it to 3 other sets of wedding related parties and such.



People. Stop being in love for like 8 seconds so this girl can breathe. Or at least find me a boyfriend who could handle watching his gf be a bridesmaid 1235 more times before he starts to freak out and run.

Also, that brings up another one of my issues thats weighing on me.
Why the EFF would I be dreaming about my ex?
Like, every single night he is in at least one if not more dreams.
Um. No thank you.

Seriously, no friggin thank you. I hate waking up and thinking about him it's just stupid. There have been other exes in the dreams which I should probably just look up and see what it means because it's starting to freak my freak.

But by far the biggest issue in my life right now is my food allergies.
Or assumed food allergies. I have no idea what is really going on with me but I feel like I'm dying.. in a food allergy sort of death.
Let me explain.

You HAVE to eat to live.
But involved is so much pain and discomfort and distress that it feels like I'd rather starve at some points.
How can this be me? I am so freaking low maintenence that it irks me to admit my body ain't workin right. At 25 I feel like a loser for having all these issues.

But god bless getting some form of insurance soon and I will be able to go to the doctor's and go check that out. Only a month more of pure agony.
Should be no problem right.
Oh yeah I have to go make dinner now. I'm afraid to cook anything. This should be awesome.

Someone please check on me in a week.

...stay tuned.

I'm gonna blame the lack of nutrition for the reason this post makes absolutely no sense whatsoever. I would apologize but what's the point I'm dying anyway.
(Lol. I spend all day with 5-12 year olds.. they've taught me the art of being Melodramatic!)