Thursday, May 19, 2011

Ello Brovah

He is my bestest friend.
He is my twenty something younger brother.
This morning he calls me, I don't answer. I was at work at 6am, i forget to call him on my break. He calls again after I've made my way into JobTwo. I see his missed calls after one last night as well I finally call him back on my way home.

He has nothing to say to me. I ask him why he called, and he honestly called at one point just to vent and/or talk on his drive home.
He then called back because he thought today was my day off and he was concerned I was sleeping the whole time and not well.

Because we don't ignore each others phone calls. Almost certainly if one of us calls the other then the line is picked up whether it is just to say,"Can I call you back later?" or something stupid like our inside joke "Poop" "On You".. don't ask about that one.

As we both age I seem to notice that we both honestly do treat each other like best friends more so than brother and sister. It is probably the coolest thing to me to know that I have someone in this world who will support me, no matter what.
I have other family that claims that, and I believe some would also. But this boy would be there in a heart beat, he would love hurt or kill anything I told him to and he keeps me laughing all the time.

I couldn't imagine a better friend than him.
But is that weird? To be BFF with your lil bro?

I dunno, but I know that he doesn't know all the shit that has been going on lately with me. Or he does, if he reads my blogs. But we tweet, and DM eachother I don't think he is on the Blogger grind. Anyway, he may not know the reason I work like a crazy woman am in school and avoiding most human contact.
But he doesn't need it to be explained to him.
He will love me no matter what.

I unfortunately don't feel that from anywhere else in my life. Sadly, best friends to me, sometimes hurt me more than anyone else can.
My brother is a prime example of that.
We used to use trigger words to set each other off back in middle school days.
If I called him "fatso" or he called me "midget" thems was fightin words.
And we would go at it. Until Mom or someone else broke it up.

We don't still have any of that venom. Or maybe we do but we are each others support systems right now that it's not brought out. Maybe as we age and grow apart it will dig itself in.

But why is that? Why when you've got time apart does one person feel righteou and the other feel shitty? It's just scary to look at families who go through a tragedy in the family and they get torn apart.

I hope that never happens to my brothers and I. I hope it doesn't continue to happen to my other best friends with whom I currently feel alienated from.
But by my own accord I've needed the space, or lacked the time. Hoping I am understood in my reasons. Hoping it's not too late.

Because with my baby bro, late doesn't exist, if you show up, you're golden.

..stay tuned.

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